Humming softly in the darkness, beneath an “ early-curb-alert-found-object desk”, my computer resides in a plastic bucket.

That’s how I like it, and let me tell you why.

The cooling fan no longer devours the dust tigers who arrogantly roam my floor.

No building maintenance mop-slopping reeking bleachy cleansers into serial ports for me!

Office mascot Brutus shall not Bulldog wizz through cracks surrounding disc-drive doors ever again.

And should Emperor Fudd’s tax man come a-knocking, I’ll just grab my PC bucket by the handle and run like hell.

by – Doug Mathewson