Saturday I dropped a jar of pickles in the Dollar Store.
(Breakage in isle whatever). 
High School girl at the register was very nice about it,
(She smiled and told me old people drop shit all the time).
To make up for the mess I bought three jars
Quickly summoned a young lout carried them to my car,
(To insure I didn’t drop these too).
I wanted to give tip him, but only had two twenties,
so I shook his big doughy hand instead.
(The boy looked at me like I was a fucking man from Mars).

by-Doug Mathewson