Caught Out

Renn always worried. He worried about something, trivial or not, almost everyday of his long long life. A life so far of over a thousand winters, but now he really had something to worry about. “I am hardly myself”, he thought. “ I am but a wind-fell weak branch. There is little magic left in me now, but I shall be a stubborn old stump.”

He was never powerful, or even regarded as clever in the wide and intricate realms of Queen Mab Kingdom. His kind were once many, and fiercely loyal to The Fey. The power and magic of Dryads was deeply knotted twisted within the trees. Oak was strength and Ash offered wisdom, but Renn dwindling tribe, still kept the oldest ways of Faerie. Rowan was Renn’s tree, the one wood of magic, the wood of his bond.  Now in a time of fewer trees, nymphs had been brought low. When sap no longer flows, natural magic dies.

He was weak, capable of only  simple, small spells. Once he could wildly shifted-shapes with ease, now he could only manage small creatures, nothing massing more that five or six kilos. For centuries he won his way artfully by theft, impersonation, and deceit. And now, he was reduced to beg. He went back-door to back-door trying shapes that might gain him a meal. He found these humans he once tricked with ease took no interest his well being when he assumed aspects of  marten, stout, pocket-bagger, or raccoon. Of the simple forms he had taken in the past, only strayed house cats gained some small degree of charity in this place, once forest, now bland domesticated lands.
He felt cold and weaker still as the seasons changed. The few remaining trees slowed for winters sleep.

Luckily Renn found his benefactor, or benefactress to be more accurate in Margarite. She was a small elderly woman whose small elderly home was thankfully beneath several mature Oaks so Renn could summon strength and and inspiration there. He appeared over several days as different cats – charming, curious, hungry cats, each in need of a meal. For his own amusement he added a unique personality to each, one affectionate, one timid, and one so rude and bold! Margarite had a loving heart, but spending so much of her time pressing and cataloguing wild flowers of  the district left her with little imagination for the naming of cats. She called him in turn “Marmalade”, “Snowbell”, and “Tiger.” Kindly she spoke with each, complementing them in the manner  that cats so love.  Often she would reminisce aloud about a Tuxedo Cat, her dearest companion of many years who had passed. Margarite was concerned about the health and well-being of her visitors, now her friends. On her pension-petite, as she called it, one cat would visit the Veterinary Clinic per month to insure their continued good health, but who should be first?  Fate would decide, she thought. “Who ever I can pop-into a pillow case today, will go first.”

Renn was adorable and cuddly,  comically overplaying “Marmalade” when the fabric closed around him. Weakened as he was, all he could do was tussle and hiss while his mind spewed curses and spells. He changed through every form he could remember, hoping to locate his small sharp sword in the possession of one. But it was no use and finally he drowsed.

A strange voice woke him “ Well, yes Mme., let us take a look at this fine chat-in-a-sack you have brought.”  Renn panicked! What had he been? Often he slept as a hedgehog rolled into a spiny ball, but that couldn’t be right!  Frantically he tried to snatch an image from Margarite’s thoughts!  A cat! Yes a cat of course! In a wink he changed just as the cloth was unknotted! Margarite caught her breath with surprise. It is the miracle I have always hoped for, thought Margarite. Renn smiled to himself and purred with satisfaction as she scooped him into her arms. He admired how striking his black and white paws looked, set against Margarite’s lavender velveteen. She trembled with joy as she held him close and  whispered, “Boots,…. you’ve come back.”

by-Doug Mathewson

Tallest of Allest

When I was kid nobody seemed as tall as a cowboy. The cowboys I admired changed as I grew up, from Roy Rogers singing on the range to Clint Eastwood delivering harsh retribution. I knew nothing about sports, but was astonished by how Michael Jordon flew, arching higher and higher in magnificent  flight. Latter heroes loomed large to me as rock-and-roll giants. They delighted me with their music, clever lyrics, and brilliant shows. Giants they were, till I encountered someone larger by far.

I was in Manhattan, headed for a gallery opening downtown. Tower Records in Times Square projected a moving image eight stories high of Jay-Z walking majestically and confidently, striding out of a fog filled back ground, Savile Row overcoat slung over
Armani shoulders, his penetrating eyes looking at, and then through me. A completely over-powering image, commanding and compelling. The after-image has stayed with me as strong inspiration to stand up for what’s right in my own life. His surprisingly political music was at both ends and the middle of the radio dial.I heard him in the cabs and on the street. The strong clear lyrics indicted George Bush and his failed regime. Jay-Z put the blame where it belonged. Blame for selling out our country, and blame for abandoning the people of New Orleans after Hurricane Katrina.

Dramatically a few weeks back, Jay-Z announced he would do free shows in support of Barack Obama’s Campaign, the first show to be in Detroit. He passionately championing the Obama message, to an overflowing huge stadium crowd, performing
“American Dream-in’” thunderously rapping out the words with incredible intensity. The band was tight, and then tighten more as Jay-Z boomed into full voice for “Minority Report”. Huge background screens alternated between pictures of Bush and bleak images of New Orleans. Images of suffering and tragedy. “ – put money in the hands of the fool who left my people stranded – ” The images came faster, the band picked up to match. “helicopters swoop down for a better scoop, but the don’t scoop you! – out on the roof for seven days – no damn food or water, and the baby’s gonna die.” Now the screens showed George Bush saluting as flags slowing drifted in the background. And
Jay-Z brought it home. “-jet blue, jet blue – what you do, if that fool fell from the sky?”
(silence, then he shrugged and theatrically walked away, turned on his heel and said) “you useless, mutha-fucka.” Pyrotechnics filled the stadium and the sky above for all to see with stark silver-white light, then “YES-WE-CAN.” The band drove the music faster still, the pace intense, but Jay-Z was even faster, leading the chanting crowd in “Obama Now”, and “Yes We Can.” A picture on Bush flashed on the center screen and Jay-Z absolutely
screamed “- YOU GOOD WITH THIS SHIT?, …. hell no.” Lights killed and in the dark boomed his voice “YESS-WEE-CANN!” Now silent, but for the breeze, small back and white photo displayed of Mr. Obama, his wife, and daughters, and mixing with the wind, carried ninety three thousand voices with,  “yes, we can.”
The following morning the McCain camp conceded Michigan to Obama and took their campaign efforts elsewhere. Now, and for all time without any question, I know who is, and shall remain, the very tallest of them all.

by-Doug Mathewson

Ekphrastic Riff

“People are such shit!” my sister screamed as she overarmed her phone against the wall.
“There’s just so much of  the good stuff to go around, you know” said her boyfriend the Archangel Gabriel, voice muffled by his wings as, lantern raised, he peered into the fridge. She bitterly resented being lectured, by immortals most of all, and I hated it when he and she fought.
“He only created so much soul back then you know, omnipotent or otherwise, no one  could have anticipated the demand” said Gabe (as we called him around the house). With fierce hand gestures and a scalding voice my sister went on and on about whatever.
All I could hear was Laurie Anderson singing:
“oh Daddy Daddy, it was just like you said
now [that] the living out number the dead”.

by-Doug Mathewson

Last Rites Of Brunch

Brunch long since over, third and fourth cups had been drained. Our lively fellowship of french toast and cajun omelets, is now reduced to a gruel of generic drivel. Every platter, fork and glass has made its’ clattering exit and now enjoy sudsy rebirth. One final fallen player remains. Wrapped within Goblin magic spells of invisibility which deceive all but me is the check. To my companions eyes it appears as road-kill squirrel.
The unrecognizable front half is smeared in a ring of condensation that emulates spent body fluids. The nether end flutters like a tail, buffeted in the wake of passing waiters.
“We must now most reverently honor the dead!” I finally proclaim. And gently place the corpse in one hand and my Visa Card in the other. A poor cortege we three from, marching with sorrowful single step cadence to my quietly hummed requiem. Duties discharged at the register, I exit, as the busboy serves up a hearty “have a nice day!”, without a crumb of sincerity.

by – Doug Mathewson

Death By Shovel

At lowest tide I visit our town beach. A purposefully unfashionable time after all the poets searching for god have finished walking their dogs. Scrup-fwop, scrup-fwop, can be heard beyond the jetty. I see two lifeguards young and tall, their sun-blond hair in matched French braids. With long handled steel shovels from Parks and Rec  they scoop up jellyfish and casually lob them up to a hot dry death upon the rocks. The oversized orange windbreakers our teen guardians wore urgently proclaiming “RESCUE”. Mercifully, jellyfish can’t read.
by – Doug Mathewson

Plan B

Since Dad was in the Air Force our family often moved when we were growing up. Even after they divorced Mom kept moving us. It just became a pattern I guess, and seemed natural. Finally after we ran out of child support and alimony Mom needed “Plan B”. Santa Fe seemed like a good choice for the three of us. I already painted a mental picture of myself in Art School, my sister planned to rope and brand a cowboy boyfriend for her very own, and poor Mom just wanted a life. A small restaurant with an apartment upstairs over in the Rail Road district was for rent and we got to work. The three of us were excited and all pitched in. Mom is a great cook (she make left-overs exciting even on the third or fourth time around) and got guys from other restaurants to moonlight in the kitchen on their days off. My sister would wait tables and turn her charm up to eleven. All I was much good for was bus tables, mop the floor, and do whatever art work was needed on menus, signs, and such.
We all wanted a south western name for the place. A woman’s name, something with appeal that felt intimate and friendly. Arguing back and forth over “Cowgirl this” and “Coyote that” got us no place. It was my sisters idea to hang around the Central Plaza and ask some of the old-time cowboys for advice. “Fine,” said Mom, “you decide, I don’t care, just hurry up, and tell your brother so he can do the signs and print some flyers”. Sis did go talk to those old boys who sat and smoked in the shade by the bandstand. She asked them, “what is your most cherished memory? The best, most wonderful thing you have ever known? Something that will always, always makes you smile no-matter what.” They were a little shy at first, but finally agreed unanimously. When I heard it, I just couldn’t help but go way-way over the top with the artwork (I thought Mom would be mad).
The restaurant has really worked out ok. Yup, “Rodeo Whore” is quite the little success story, and man do we sell a lot of t-shirts online!

by – Doug Mathewson

Safe Harbor

In Under Milk Wood Old Captain Cat in his delirium calls out, “Let me shipwreck in your thighs”.

For me, at age fifteen, it carried such a sensual weight and power.

As a grown man it struck me as both selfish and arrogant.

These days I find it speaks of redemption and a loving forgiveness.

by – Doug Mathewson

Computer Safety

Humming softly in the darkness, beneath an “ early-curb-alert-found-object desk”, my computer resides in a plastic bucket.

That’s how I like it, and let me tell you why.

The cooling fan no longer devours the dust tigers who arrogantly roam my floor.

No building maintenance mop-slopping reeking bleachy cleansers into serial ports for me!

Office mascot Brutus shall not Bulldog wizz through cracks surrounding disc-drive doors ever again.

And should Emperor Fudd’s tax man come a-knocking, I’ll just grab my PC bucket by the handle and run like hell.

by – Doug Mathewson

Poor Snuffie

We needed warmer costuming for our travels to the north. The money was already spent on on plane tickets, art supplies, and snacks. A gift from above! 50% off coupons from “Bargain Barn” came just in time! Always fashion forward, we choose the blackest of ultra-soft vests. At check out time my wife says “these things are so soft, I bet they’re made out of muppett fur!” Eyebrow piercings scrunched together as our clerk slowly read the label, ‘no mam, says here it’s all acrylic”.

by – Doug Mathewson

Ekphrastic Riff

“People are such shit!” my sister screamed as she overarmed her phone against the wall.
“There’s just so much of  the good stuff to go around, you know” said her boyfriend the Archangel Gabriel, voice muffled by his wings as, lantern raised, he peered into the fridge. She bitterly resented being lectured, by immortals most of all, and I hated it when he and she fought.
“He only created so much soul back then, omnipotent or otherwise, no one  could have anticipated the demand” said Gabe (as we called him around the house). With fierce hand gestures and a scalding voice my sister went on and on about whatever.
All I could hear was Laurie Anderson singing:
“oh Daddy Daddy, it was just like you said
now [that] the living out number the dead”.

by-Doug Mathewson